Childhood and Audiobiographies

My room is a mess. It kinda bothers me, but obviously not enough to make me actually get up and clean it.

When I was a teenager living at home my room was pretty much always a mess. When I was at school and had roommates my room was pretty reasonable. I wouldn't call it a mess, but it wasn't super tidy either. When I moved into my own apartment it was spotless. You would think that I've established a trend here. Bad to better to best. Some might say it's because I've been "growing up" - whatever that means. Now that I'm living at home again my room is a mess. So much for that theory.

So what is it then? This question has been weighing heavily on my mind now for about the last thirty seconds. Is it because now that I'm home I've abandoned all sense of responsibility in order to feel more like a child again? Do I just want someone else to take care of everything for me? Was my apartment only clean because I knew people would see it when they came over and I'm safe in the knowledge that no one will visit me here? Am I really that superficial? Do I really care that much about whether people think I'm neat or not? Or is it something more sinister?

That last question just kind of popped up out of nowhere. I think every long string of probing questions deserves a dramatic close. That one kind of sounded like something you'd hear in a movie trailer from a guy with a ridiculously low voice that manages to make even the most idiotic things sound cool. Not that they'd ever make a movie about my messy room, but I'm sure that if anyone could sell it it would be that guy. If I ever write an autobiography I need to make sure to note at the beginning that the book is meant to be read out loud in a super low male voice that over accentuates every single word. Heck, maybe I'll just skip the printed version and publish it as an audio-autobiography. Of course, the question remains: Would anyone buy it? Will I ever be that famous? Is there a legal way to prevent a written transcription from being made? Is it really that transparent that I had no idea what I was going to write about tonight? The world may never know...